Since a week or two I feel a burning kind of intese joy inside my chest. I don't know where it comes from. It seems to be there almost continously regardless of circumstances. But it does make a difference in how I experience circumstances. What used to be stressful for me isn't stressful anymore. Most events are much more enjoyable. Being in crowded places for instance in the city. It still isn't my favorite place to be, but it doesn't bring me out of balance, or taking a metro at rush hour, no problem at the moment. It gives a wonderful feeling of freedom and energy.
Sometimes it goes to my head and then I feel like being drunk. I am full of ideas and inclined to run off in totally different directions, very chaotic and very difficult to make a choice, over excited. It is so much too much. Then I have to calm myself, stop thinking, do something very physical or do noting at all and everything becomes clear again.
Now my challenge is to trust that feeling, relax into it and trust that whatever will happen is just fine. Even when I don't understand exactly why I feel I have got to do something and I can't follow all my impulses.